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Man Realizes Weed Is Not The Same As “Back In His Day”

Brandon Stangl

Early Saturday morning, 49 year-old Program Manager, Harry Fields, was found passed out in his apartment lobby. Mr. Fields reportedly got adventurous after a night out with his younger, hipper team members. Following several after work cocktails, Harry’s team talked him into joining them for a stop by El Kush Clone Bar and Dispensary. Harry, wanting desperately to fit in, agreed saying, “I’ve smoked a joint or two back in my day,” referring to the one time in 1992, he shared a joint stuffed with dried shwag with his college roommate. “I was mainly surprised by all the options,” Harry said, recalling the dispensary. “I thought there was only one pot and was pleasantly surprised to be able to choose between the different types of pot.” 

Harry was talked into ordering a handful of edibles, and 10 grams of Mango Choco Loco, that sources say is a hybrid strain with a distinct kush flavor, pine aftertaste, and a THC content of 16%. “The last thing I remember was taking my first hit of the marijuana. Next thing I know, I was waking up in the lobby, covered in Cheetos crumbs.”

When asked to comment, Harry’s coworker Mitch Jones said, “Harry really couldn’t keep his shit together. First he was giggling, then he was crying, then he thought his feet were glued to the fucking ground for eternity. It got real weird.” When asked if Harry would be joining the team members for after work drinks in the future, both parties said no, claiming the split was amicably.